Exercise R Us » Running Shoes » funny show ad vocabulary expander :-)
Question:
This has been around before but I thought some of you would enjoy it 
Nancy How to Read a Breed Magazine Show Dog Advertisement: (the ad of course is one placed by your rivals in the ring <VBG> – Nancy) Respected Judge ….He put up our dog twice Esteemed Judge …..He puts up anything that crawls Shown Sparingly …. Only when we had it in the bag Show Prospect …….He has 4 legs, 2 eyes, 2 ears, 1tail Finished in 5 shows ……And 89 where he failed to win a ribbon Won in heavy competition…….The others were revoltingly overweight Multiple group winner….. At 2 puppy matches Specialist Judge …..Puts up anything that looks like his own breeding Quiet gentle natured …..After 4 valiums Excels in type and style……However, moves like a spider on speed Personality Plus…… Wakes up if you put liver up his nose Large boned…..Looks like a Clydesdale Good bite ….. Missed the judge, got the steward Lovely head…..2 eyes, 2 ears, 1 mouth, 1nose Excels in movement ……If he gets loose, put on your running shoes Gorgeous Coat….. If the hair spray lasts until the class finishes Handled brilliantly by….. Nobody else can get near him Won in stiff competition…..Beat 4 puppies and a 9 year old novice dog At stud to "approved" bitches…..Those bitches whose owners check is approved" by our bank Line bred from famous champions…..Ch Whoozitz appears twice in 8th generation Good Obedience prospect….Smart enough to come in from the rain but he’s UG-LEE Terrific brood bitch…..Her conformation is the pits, but she throws big litters Great stud dog ……Mounts anything that can fog a mirror Loves children …..For breakfast, lunch and dinner Wins another Best In Show ….His second, under the same judge, our uncle
Response:
> Good bite ….. Missed the judge, got the steward
Pffffffffffffth snort choke haackhaackhaack Coffee alert needed! Janet "how do I get that cappuccino out of the keyboard" Baldwin
no comment untill now